I am boring because...

Everybody keeps on asking me the same question, why am I so boring? I haven't done any course in this department, but still I can compete with the best of the bests.

People call me all the time and ask the same question... wats new, wats up and wats happening ! I just feel so glad that they expect me to be new and happening. But I also feel sad that I can't match up to their expectations of new and happening. It is the learned helplessness syndrome [psycho!] that I have to encounter, where no matter what I say, they would retort with the same rhetoric "You are boring!".

And suddenly I feel a deep sense of compunction towards their utter disbelief that it is them who have turned boring! They want to hear something new, and when I tell them about the current affairs in India's diplomatic relations, again the same rant...You are boring! It is this incessant ranting that has led me to deliberate on this nugatory topic....Why am I so boring? ( Also, because I am free these days :P)

In the hindsight, I was never this boring. During my childhood, I used to sit all day on the window and watch the cycles pass by my house. I used to dig a hole whole day and then again fill it up. And yet, I never felt bored. I guess people didn't call me then to tell me that. This means that I wasn't born one, but I have been turned into a bore.

I remember my very first acquaintance with boredom....that was school. The soporific methods of teaching, the punishments that involved jotting the same answer 20 times, mugging up the answers even in social sciences, and the insipid manner of teaching poetry...They taught me to suck the creativity and amusement out of any activity!

Still, I managed to pass through it, thanks to the movies of Shahrukh khan (pun intended!) which helped me to develop this parallel universe in which my college life would be 'happening'!! "Kuch kuch hota hai" and "Main hoon na" made me believe that as soon as 'boring school' ends we will enter the gateway of 'happening college' (kuch kuch nahi bhi to kuch to hoga :P).

I guess this new found definition of "happening" made me even more boring when I saw that Shahrukh Khan was not there. My "Happening college" had a huge entrance; and the gate would open; and a huge building would stand in front of me; with lots of girls wearing red, green and yellow colors, adorned with absurd accessories waiting around so that the gate would open and I would enter wearing a kool denim and shades ....and we all would dance!. But alas! there was no huge entrance gate, they asked me to provide identity card; there was no huge building standing, I had to walk 1.5 km into the woods to reach a deserted building; there was no one... not to talk of girls ..not even guys. All I could see was skinny guys moving around like zombies in there bland t-shirts and thick spects. I hate Shahrukh :P. He is a liar (I used Fair and Handsome and wat do u expect after listening to him! )

College education further took away the fun out of maths, the epsilons and deltas, the differential equations and the approximations decimated my imagination! Moreover, there was no Sushmita sen to teach me :P. Had she been there, I would have shown to the department that I can also wear ironed clothes and I can also take shower.
Most of the time discussions would start with "kya boring hai yaar...kuch karte hain", and some sort of Pygmalion effect must have occurred !!

These were the days when I was exposed to a whole new world of boring people. They call this world - Orkut. People who would wait a day to get the answer to "aur be...kya haal chaal" and they would preserve the answer into some unknown servers just so that one day their grandchildren can read up to their legacy and be proud that their forefathers had a record number of scraps. Suddenly, sitting peerless on the computer, changing the profiles, joining communities just to look kool became fad. This made the parties and hangouts even more boring and they were turned into photo sessions just to put a kool pic on the damn orkut! I just don't get it that why would a bunch of losers take a snap and put it on orkut, and the same group members would comment on it and would find it kool :B. I guess I get it now...because its a group of losers!

But leaving orkut doesn't help, as boredom finds its own ways to corrupt your life. There is this instrument called cellphone. The boring sms shayaris about dil, dosti etc. divided my kool quotient by infinity. People have started putting boring songs as there caller tunes, I don't get it again why a loser would call someone to listen a song :P. I guess I get it now....because he is a loser!!

I guess I have added enough reasons and bored you enough to prove the point that I am not boring, its environment these days. Look at the TV, there is boring media with boring news channels, boring serials, boring movies ...we are filling the world with boredom. If climate change does not, boredom will kill.

Now I don't get why would a loser think so deep into it, and write a boring blog about a boring topic which nobody is going to read. I guess I get it now :)

Not because he is a loser....its because he is bored !!